We don't talk anymore...

Thank you to Bliatz and Dirty TalkingGirl for their comments on my post about cunnilingus.

If I may, I'll start with Bliatz's comments, which I repeat here. She was talking about my wife's unwillingness and my confusion over that part of our sex life.

Get her drunk and ask her.

If she doesn't drink ... ask her whenever seems appropriate. Maybe she's too sensitive in some particular places (too much stimulation can be very, very unpleasant), or perhaps she's covertly submissive (as I was until I gathered the nerve to exit that closet) and just needs the rougher stuff these days?

Do you talk about these things??

Hmm... Well, communication isn't a strong point in the Salvatori marriage. That sounds awful, so I need to explain...

Firstly I have to admit that we are both shy individuals - strange in that we both have high profile, public facing professional roles. I have often wondered about this but we both definitely put on "work faces". I know that after being outgoing and gregarious all day at work, I want to retreat into my own little world when I am at home. My wife seems to be the same. We don't enjoy talking about difficult stuff. We never row - we sulk.

Secondly, I have tried to talk to her - a bold step for me. She will only say, "I don't like it." When I question why, she answers "I just don't." Case closed, end of story, please move on. So I'm firmly back in issue one.

I did wonder if it was a submissive thing. I have pondered whether the obeisance aspect of cunnilingus (i.e. me giving selflessly to her pleasure in an act which, if reversed - her sucking my cock - placed her in subspace) was part of her reluctance.

Indeed, there was one time when she went a bit beserk with cunnilingus. We were in the middle of a fairly intense session and I had arranged her on her back, head hanging over the end of the bed. I was standing fucking her mouth (actually, thinking about this, I want to do that again;-)). I initially stuck two fingers into her pussy and then bent forward to lick her labia and clitoris. She went mad, bucking her hips and grinding her pussy into my face (but I guess that it could have been to get me to stop - she couldn't really vocalise at that point...). The point is, I thought that my phyically dominant position at that moment may have "let" her release herself.

I had personally decided the too much stimulation was not the case - she seems to like grinding against me and likes having her nipples pinched, pulled and sucked hard. As an aside it is amazing the variation in nipple sensitivity in women - I have gently sucked some nips and had to scrape their owner from the ceiling and other girls really need harsher handling...